Wednesday, October 21, 2009

DAY 2: skirting death, appeal to hospitality and gratitude...

Hello.

3 Things I want to address:  

1. My gratitude for a few in particular back at home...
2. Short dissertation on american lack of hospitality acceptance...
3.  Today's near death experience...and a new food that I plan on utilizing to gain 20 pounds.

1. Gratitude:

I'm always stressed before I leave for a trip of any duration...not to mention one for two months.  Adding to the stress is that I will have a house guest during my absence (which means must leave the house SPOTLESS...new towels, sheets, etc. etc.), i have unresolved court issues that are impossible to resolve on the trip (have to go to court for 'rolling' through a stop sign...), and it's not the ideal economic climate to take such trip...  During my last week...I had a few friends REALLY step up to the plate that has TOUCHED ME TREMENDOUSLY!

Annie:  You are my world...thank you all that you do and your GENUINE interest and care for me.  Every time I hear from you....you exceed my expectations.  Simply no words for how much your care means to me.  From the amazingly thoughtful journal...to coming over on my last night...to the caring email and texts today just 'to see how i was'.  you exceed and exceed...  THANK YOU.

Marci:  What a dear dear friend you are!  Sometimes I feel bad if I can not give you full attention (like when I came over yesterday morning before my flight...I had so much on my mind!)...  It is such an amazing thing to know for a FACT that I can count on you...  I have no had a lot of that in my life...at all...and you consistently prove that I am important to you...and for that I am ETERNALLY thankful!  You have NO idea how much you taking care of this court thing means to me...it was the last blockade to my peace of mind...  THANK YOU.  I will be thinking of you often while here...

Kirstie:  Thank you so so much for being such a loyal and MOTHERLY friend!  Your email in which you ask for my address, really showed love and care...and i was very very touched.  I know you are also going through a tough phase right now...and I appreciate you extending your energy to me despite...  THANK YOU.  Thank you for taking care of the car...and offering to do anything to help...  You understand me...  I am blessed to have you on my side...

Dan:  You have touched my world deeply last week.  Not much to say here...but that connection...seeing it...has put me in a very thankful position...  a RENEWED position.  i can't wait to see you.  pizza.

I have also received numerous emails and well wishes from everyone...please know:  It is because of YOU I love LOVE so much.  It feels amazing to be in your thoughts...  I thank you for that comfort...

(*** NOTE:  If you've made it this far down in my sappy-ness...I love you even more!)

2.  Lack of Hospitality Acceptance.

This BLOWS!  This topic was so important for me to address that I put it in my calendar so I did not forget.  It entered my mind on about hour 22 of the 24 hour trip.  The thai and japanese women were all SO warm...so proudly 'subservient' (I only use this term because it is easy to understand from an American perspective).  I love this.  It does not imply that they are weak...or have a low-paying job...or "do what they are told"...  They are simply being WOMEN.  They are being CARING.  They are being LOVING.  Since when did that become TABOO in the states!?

I can't exude this kind of behavior without some man thinking that I am somehow trying to 'appeal' to him (the irony here is that only the SMART men think like this...simpler men simply take it as is...from my experience anyway).  Honestly...I simply LIKE to cater.  it's true.  I like to take care of people.  it's my thing.  I don't expect anything back...just an appreciation of the care. I would LOVE to be able to exist in this pure environment of simply acting naturally...and not have men think it's 'because of this or that'.  Notice I don't include women here...because those women that I spend time with...do allow this...and they reciprocate.  I do not expect the reciprocity from men.  They have their own talents that I watch and admire from afar.  How strong they are...how analytical they are...  I would like men to just let women be...and take care of them...  It is what we do best...  it's only efficient...  

3.  Food and Death...independently:

Today is a day of acclimation...errands (self-imposed thank goodness!)...eating...and rest.  Tomorrow we start boxing training...

I'm going to the grocery store this morning to stock-up on fruit and water and the only thing between me and the store is a little road.  Normally...in this sans-stop light situation, I look both ways and cross.  IMPOSSIBLE!  I stood there for a half hour devising a plan to cross...meanwhile I watched a dozen thai men gunshot across the street nearly jumping over cars...  NO way in HELL am I going to do this (most of you know how risk averse I am...).  So another ten minutes go by...  I decided to gun it (chance of death is a small price for delicious food...)  I'm pretty sure I got windburn from one of the cars that nearly took out my ACL...  This is going to be interesting...  Perhaps I do my 'errands' at 5 AM...

Upon my return to the guesthouse...i decided to let loose and throw down the $2 for the breakfast buffet.  I CLEARED THIS PLACE OUT!  Well...really just one dish...the banana chip cereal!  It's not even 'cereal'...it's just banana chips and milk!  DELISH!  I would LOVE to say that it was 'healthy'...but the SUGAR milk that the chips left me with makes me think otherwise...  Nevertheless...I really hope this does not become a habit...  I FEAR...

I meet with my trainer this afternoon at 4...then an evening work-out and would love to be in bed by 10...  We'll see...  I have enough apples and pears in my room to start a grocery store...so that will be dinner...

Well...that's all for today...thank you dear friends...

Much love and affection...

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